- Where does ‘real’ come from?
- Tune up your ‘BS’ meter.
- Being ‘still’ is a start—here’s how.
Are you for Real?
We all like to think we are being real…as if that’s the only way to be. The reason we may not always be real has to do with our personal history, our upbringing, the traumas that may have befallen us in our youth, and the way our brains have locked on to those traumas.
To own your own business or to aspire to be successful in business will force most of us to say and do things we never thought we would say or do. Sometimes that can be a good thing but more often it means we fall back into saying or acting in ways that are not what we wished we would have said or done. What if you could have that moment of insight that helps you to use the opportunities you have to change any outcome for the better.
So this brings up a challenge. How do you know when you or anyone else is being real?
Some people are really good at fooling others and sometimes we are really good at trying to fool ourselves. I know I have noticed that little feeling in the pit of my stomach that after the fact reminds me that I really didn’t mean to say something. But I’m not just talking about guilt either.
There is this idea of a “BS” meter in each of us. The “BS” meter is like an internal lie detector. The wiring for this mysterious machine resides both in our brains and our guts.
If it has not been used in a while the connections may be rusty but they can be polished up by reuse.
How to test this device? If you watch any Television, and or listen to news, especially news and commentary carefully your BS meter should be going off frequently. This does not mean people are necessarily lying to you, for they may in fact believe deeply in what they are saying, but there is a place in you that can show you that just saying something does not make it real or true. I’m not saying forget logic…logic is in short supply in most arguments and commercials. The BS meter resides more in the gut…as in something doesn’t feel right.
So what’s this have to do with being real in business? One thing about being human is that we will make mistakes but to be real means we will learn from them and act accordingly. One goal you may want to seriously consider is to learn how to be real in your own skin.
Life is complicated, breathing is simple! The fact that most of us no longer breathe correctly is well researched. But there is even more you can do with breath.
Just follow the instructions.
Sit still or stand or lie down or even take a walk. Choosing a quiet place and time may be more helpful at first. Breathe deeply, following your breath as it passes in and out of your nose or mouth. Follow each breath all the way in and out of your body. Focus only on each breath then the next. If some thought enters your mind then refocus your mind on your breath. Doing this a little each day (start with a minute then increase the time a little each day) will move you in the direction of knowing what is real in you and once you find that ‘real’ you will be moving towards being real with others. I’m not trying to trick you into becoming a meditator (that’s ok of course) but rather have you experience stillness inside so you can achieve a realness that you and others will notice. This practice leads to being more present which will lead to other successful skills. Make this a daily routine and increase the time allotted slowly…you will see/feel different…in a good way.
Keep up the good work!
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